Ahhh love! What would we do without love? Even though love comes with its ups and downs, we can agree that it is worth living. It is often beautiful, but it can be less so when mutual disrespect enters the relationship.
Here are 6 red lights to watch for in your relationship:
1- Do you feel that your partner often puts you down in the way he or she talks to you?
If so, these remarks, mockery and other insults can become more and more frequent and turn into "moral harassment", which is a form of violence in love.
2- Do you feel less confident than when you started the relationship?
A healthy relationship is based on respect, compassion and patience, and allows everyone to grow and feel good about themselves. So, if you don't feel as good about yourself as you used to, it may be that your relationship is more toxic than you think.
3- Do you feel a lot of stress related to the relationship?
Over time, if the relationship is toxic, it is normal to feel some stress. One part of you knows that your relationship is problematic, but the other part refuses to let go of it. When you feel stressed about everything, it's easy to develop bigger problems such as anxiety attacks and depression.
4- Are you afraid of your partner's reactions?
One of the most important things in a couple is to feel safe in each other's presence. If you are afraid of your partner's reactions, this is something that cannot be negotiated. If when you argue, you are afraid he or she will hurt you, that is not acceptable. If you are accountable for where you are at all times, that's not healthy. You should never stay in a relationship where you don't feel good and are unable to be yourself.
5- Do you feel manipulated by your partner?
If so, your partner may be trying to control you. He or she will tend to impose his or her vision of things and choices without taking your wishes into account. This is domination. Also, he or she may try to make him or herself the victim by using emotional blackmail (e.g.: if you refuse to do this, there will be such and such consequences). In this case, the victim of blackmail may become withdrawn, see less and less of friends and family, and always feel the need to do the right thing so as not to disappoint the partner.
6- Is your partner always jealous?
The fact that a partner is always jealous can be very invasive and intrusive. Sick jealousy is when one person in the relationship regularly checks on the other, going through their belongings and subjecting them to a lot of questioning. This sounds a lot like control, because a jealous person may also want to control the other person's appearance, for example by preventing them from wearing an outfit, cutting their hair, and encouraging them to reduce their social circle.
You must always succeed in being yourself in a relationship, because when you start to change and accept the constraints of the other person, you lose yourself in the relationship and it becomes toxic. To learn more about what is toxic or not in a relationship: Take the test by trying this game from SOS Violence Conjugale and see our video on Youtube.
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